Simple Tips to Get Through The Festive Season.

Megon Champion
Dec 19, 2024
5 min read

An evergreen garland with paper tags spelling out the word merry

Whether you are going through divorce or grief, have a toxic family, anxiety, or get a bit overwhelmed, the festive season can be a tough time of year to navigate. However, a few helpful tips can help you cope and even allow you to have some fun.

Protect Yourself First.

Whether dealing with family, friends, or just the season's vibe, the best place to start is to protect yourself.

Tip 1: Create a Safe Space.

This could be a room in your house, a spot in your garden, or anywhere else you can find peace. Ensure those around you respect this space and use it when you feel overwhelmed.

Tip 2: Have a Routine and Get Enough Sleep.

“You are not you when you're tired.” Create a simple routine and stick to it. This will help you from feeling overwhelmed. Try and include a bit of physical activity in the routine as this can help you sleep better.

Tip 3: Ask for Help.

Knowing when to ask for help and who you can ask for help from can ease the burden around the festive season. It is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of strength.

Tip 4: Avoid Triggers.

This could be anything that makes you feel overwhelmed or out of control. It could be avoiding social media, discussing politics or religion, and avoiding shopping malls (you can always shop online), etc.,

Tip 5: Create a Care Team.

Surround yourself with friends or family who understand what you are going through at this time of year. They need to be people you can rely on if things start to get out of control and will be there if you need to ask for help.

Dealing With Grief.

Any holiday is harder after having lost a loved one, however, the festive season seems particularly harder as it is always pictured as a family holiday. And now someone is missing.

Tip 1: Set Boundaries.

Discuss with those around you how much or how little of the festivities you are going to be able to cope with.

Tip 2: Have a Plan A And a Plan B.

This is where plan A is where you are okay to join in with the festivities. And plan B is where you have woken up struggling and can’t make the original plan so you have some nice food at home and watch a festive movie etc.

Tip 3: Include the Loved One That Has Passed.

Light a candle for them. Watch their favourite movie. Tell your favourite story about them. Include them in your festivities in a small way so that you can remember and still have fun.

Tip 4: Acknowledge Your Grief.

It’s okay to be sad. You do not need to hide it to be strong for those around you. Over time you will create new memories but for now, you are allowed to sit with your grief.

Stickers showing cracks between two people as well as a broken heart

Facing Divorce.

Divorce is always difficult, whether amicable or not. Even if you have children or not, the festive season will look different.

Tip 1: You Don’t Have To Fake It Till You Make It.

It is okay to admit that you are feeling lonely, sad, or even angry. You don’t have to pretend that you are still the perfect family, you can take separate family photos, etc. Remember to not put too much pressure on yourself.

Tip 2: Have Open Communication with Your Ex. (With Boundaries.)

This is so you can easily set dates as to where children are on what dates, what presents are appropriate etc. All of this must be done in such a way that protects your mental health, so keep the communication open but set boundaries. For example, your ex can’t just call you at midnight. If you and your ex cannot be amicable, use a trusted third party to communicate for you.

Tip 3: Create New Traditions.

Create some new traditions that are special just to you and are separate from your previous relationship. This could be as simple as opening presents on Christmas Eve instead of Christmas Day.

Tip 4: Have Somewhere to Go If You Are Feeling Lonely.

This is self-explanatory. Create a support system that you can escape to, if you are feeling lonely. A coffee meet-up, a meal, or even a phone call can go a long way to making you feel a lot more like you again.

Dealing With Toxic Family.

Not all families are picture-perfect. Dealing with toxic family members is tough on a good day, add the stress of the festive season and everything seems ten times worse.

Tip 1: Protect Your Holiday.

If possible don’t see your family on the actual holiday, or if you have to create a day that you see as your actual holiday. This way if things do go south, they haven’t ruined your holiday.

Tip 2: Remember It’s Not You.

As hard as this is, remember a lot of the time the person is projecting their own inner pain, or untreated mental health conditions onto you. Take a deep breath and walk away.

Tip 3: Avoid Triggers.

Avoid things that could lead to another argument. For example, suggest a dry party (there are so many fun alcohol-freetails out there), avoid idle time with games and puzzles and most importantly avoid topics of conversations like politics and religion. At all times remember to protect yourself.

Tip 4: You Can Always Leave.

Ultimately the aim is always to protect yourself and those closest to you. If you have gone to another family member’s house and things are going wrong, you can always leave. Go out for ice-creams on the way home or go and see the lights. If the family has come to you, ask them to leave. Watch a movie and calm down. You can deal with the fall-out later but for now, you are safe. When everyone is calm and level-headed then you can discuss a way forward.